I don't know if I will be ever able to report from Beyond, but I can assure you now that haven submitted my thesis I feel reborn. And as dramatic as it may sound, it is a new life, it means finally not being a student any more, it means a chance to finally (and at least formally) become an adult. One of those adults who plan a holiday or chose which car insurance is more convenient. And maybe even getting a car.
As writing has proved to be such a struggle, I can easily confess that writing is not one of my greatest talents, neither academical, nor creative writing. But analyzing my own life, that's something you bet I'm good at. I am also very good on procrastinating, and that is how I happen to be having a blog - it's my personal contribution to the wide-ranging but well-known stereotypes of procrastination (like, how original it is to clean up your fridge in the evening before a submission deadline!?).
If somebody happens to be interested, the topic of my thesis was 'perfection'. The Perfection in Albert the Great. I got many of those vague "Oh, very nice" reactions when I was being asked about my dissertation topic. On academic level, I am still not sure if that topic really worked. But being now able to have a more detached look at it, it was maybe not a case that I chose to work on the perfection. Analyzing myself, my life, and my world, in order to get better, that is what I was always interested in. And while it doesn't mean that I will become perfect (ha!) it does nevertheless mean that I am interested in the process of perfectioning oneself. Because, and I can give you some textual evidence on that!, man is not able to change; but he is able to become better, i.e. more perfect.
I profoundly believe in this. Usually we are hoping that things are going to change, or that our partners are going to change, or that some other important person is going to change. That is unrealistic illusion that might prove very disappointing. But the inability to change isn't disappointing as such. While we are never going to really and profoundly change, we still have the chance to become better. And that is why the hard work on thinking and rethinking and insisting is necessary. We are born in certain ways, and we can work on the raw material we have at our disposal, to make it better.
Strangely enough, what was the deadline of my second PhD happened to be also the birth date of my twins.
But you know what? New life is just a continuation of the old one. New smile born out of previous struggles, quarrels, frustrations... and passion. Like the passion to be a better self.